UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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