He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
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Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
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I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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