this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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