didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
