i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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