whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?