Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  You can't special order awesome

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): You can't special order awesome http://tfl.nu/116h
  Replies (14) Good night (2886) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning. http://tfl.nu/m75t
  Replies (13) Good night (1238) Bad night (3215)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky. http://tfl.nu/xwxi
  Replies (8) Good night (587) Bad night (3228)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in http://tfl.nu/mb19
  Replies (9) Good night (862) Bad night (3199)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me http://tfl.nu/46xf
  Replies (11) Good night (3647) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared. http://tfl.nu/jdkh
  Replies (8) Good night (2856) Bad night (968)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA. http://tfl.nu/tqpj
  Replies (7) Good night (3546) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault. http://tfl.nu/ytww
  Replies (5) Good night (2760) Bad night (1223)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch http://tfl.nu/iuw1
  Replies (20) Good night (2995) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious. http://tfl.nu/8gkr
  Replies (5) Good night (1836) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend http://tfl.nu/ua0w
  Replies (11) Good night (2354) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone? http://tfl.nu/6czx
  Replies (6) Good night (1241) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5. http://tfl.nu/zz72
  Replies (7) Good night (1207) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her http://tfl.nu/a25x
  Replies (4) Good night (761) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!" http://tfl.nu/o6vj
  Replies (3) Good night (914) Bad night (234)

Randomize