I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize