We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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