the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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