i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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