So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
