I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
where are my eyebrows?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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