As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
