please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
She has the best kind of daddy issues
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
