I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.