Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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