it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
