I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
4 words: hood of his car
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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