sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
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