she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
nutella sex= disaster
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Your shirt... Was in my pants
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
