Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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