My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
