PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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