im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
