Pappa wants mamma naked
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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