hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
