Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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