16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
