I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
