Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Randomize
