Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
