therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
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