Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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