I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize