I'm drive I can fine osifer
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
