I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
