How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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