I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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