The maid of honor just puked.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She's the barista slut.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Randomize
