all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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