so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You're like the curious george of whores
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
