she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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