Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I enjoy the company of your penis
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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