doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
