Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
