To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize