His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
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She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
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Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
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I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.