im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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