The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Randomize
