new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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