apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Enjoy the penises
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
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